The Challenges of A Long-Distance Relationships


Long distance relationships are by NO means impossible BUT there are certain factors one must consider. Before you and your partner even think about a long distance relationship, you must first be sure that both of you are ready and willing to put in the work!

The strains on a long-distance relationship are many and intense. Frequently, couples in this situation quote “absence makes the heart grow fonder” as a way of reassuring themselves and each other that their love will sustain them over the difficulties of distance and time.

But unless both partners are committed to doing the very hard work of being together alone, their relationship will soon fall to another, equally common saying: “Out of sight, out of mind.” The immediate demands of work and the availability of attractive, available singles can, and regularly do, overwhelm good intentions and even love.

What can a couple do to preserve their love and relationship over the miles?

1. Both members of the couple are committed to the commitment.All relationships have their ups and downs. All relationships have times when one or the other partner feels held back, misunderstood, not given enough, left in the dust, or any of a whole host of less-than-wonderful feelings. The couples that make it, whether they live together or apart, are those that understand that this is a natural part of a long-term commitment. Working through difficult times usually strengthens and betters the relationship.

The long-distance couple is especially challenged during these times. When people live together, there are hundreds of little opportunities every day to connect, to reassure, to touch, to pick up a conversation that was too hard to finish an hour ago, to try again and again. The long distance couple needs to take the time to phone, to e-mail, to stay in contact even when it would be so much easier and more pleasant not to.

2. Think of ways to include each other. Just because you guys are not physically together,  it does not mean you cannot watch a movie together! Schedule a time to call each other while watching the same movie so you can interact as if you were together. A movie is just ONE example of an activity you can plan, it is important to be creative, so put your thinking caps on!

3. Take advantage of visual technology. Instead of your routine telephone conversations “spice things up,” use free tools such as Skype and FaceTime, this will bring you together in a more intimate setting.  For example, you can eat dinner together, hold a conversation, or even do something to keep your love life exciting. Doing so will ensure that your face to face chemistry remains intact!

4. Always let your partner know when you are thinking about them . Try to send each other “flirty” little text messages throughout the day. Don’t hold back from telling your partner how much you care about them.

5. Keep your partner guessing, when in a long distance relationship it is important to go the extra mile to keep you partner happy. Send flowers,  cards, etc.- for no reason at all.

6.  Try to avoid jealousy and false accusations. Avoiding petty arguments is very important in a long distance relationship. It is vital to remember you “love each other.” Sometimes, the want or desire to be near one another can cause a rift in your relationship. Don’t Let It! One of you need to step and declare how meaningful you mean to one another to keep the strength on point.

7. Make sure every occasion you and your partner spend together is special. Make it memorable,  so that during the times when you are apart you can reflect on those unforgettable moments. Having a good time when you are together will also help give you and your partner something to look forward to the next time around.

What long distance relationship problems have you experienced?
What helped?